An Interesting Made Me Question Our Need To Categorise
Our need to categorise is driven by a need to know or a need for certainty.
This week I saw a comment on a post about insomnia. It got me thinking about how a simple categorisation can limit our ability to be unique; to pick and choose what we like from the buffet of life. What’s more, it can limit our ability to make beneficial changes and expand our thinking to find new solutions.
So, the post I’m referring to the suggestion that getting out of bed when you can’t sleep is a good idea. Fair enough! I personally experienced illness-related insomnia for 18 months or so, and I was willing to try anything to allay the boredom of staring at the ceiling. As I browsed the page, a somewhat aggressive comment caught my eye, it read “I’ve been an insomniac for 25 years and I know that getting out of bed is stupid.” We’re all entitled to an opinion, and I can remember how grumpy I was when I didn’t sleep well for an extended period of time. Yet there was something about this comment that triggered my curiosity.
Moreover, what happens when our need to categorise a behaviour gets in the way of finding a solution?
Curiosity Brings So Many Questions
Instantly, my brain is filled with so many questions. Does this person ever get out of bed? Could it be possible that this person likes being an insomniac? That is to say, they’ve been doing it for 25 years, so could they be in their comfort zone? What happens when you do something for 25 years, does it make you an expert? Is a 25-year-old an expert on life? What value or belief system is causing this person to be aggressive, are they defending insomnia? Have they become so attached to their condition that it feels like ownership? What does the label “insomniac” mean to this person? And if it’s been such a big part of their life, is it listed on their CV? Does an insomniac feel guilty if they sleep really well for one night? Is it ok to mention a really good nap if you’re an insomniac?
There’s No Right Or Wrong Answer Here
Now, since I don’t know this person, I have no relevant answers to my shower of questions. Although, it did make me wonder just how much I had limited myself by categorisation in the past; and the present. Have you noticed how our need to categorise syndromes and depression and other behaviours is so prevalent these days?
How Does Our Need To Categorise Affect Us?
When I started thinking about all the categorisations we have in our societies I had a pretty alarming wake up call. Moreover, I’m pretty sure I’ve locked my brain in a box at least once per day for the last forty something years! In fact, I’m sure we all have.
So what’s the problem? I hear you ask. It’s the age of the ideas we’re chaining ourselves to that concerns me, and the mismatch to the pace of change that’s going on in the world right now.
In my opinion, believe that we have to shake things up a bit and get out of our archaic mind prisons, addressing our limitations as we go.
Is “Professional” Written On Your CV?
How many of us have the word “professional” on our CVs? I guess quite a few. What does it mean? Well if you ask the dictionary, it merely means someone who is paid to do a job or someone with a qualification or skillset relevant to a specific job. Moreover, we’ve attached so much more to the meaning in society haven’t we? Professional conduct and unprofessional conduct have a very different connotation.
So, if I say I’m a professional, does that mean I’ve only ever worked when I’ve been paid? Does it mean that I’ve only ever behaved in a professional manner? Because, honestly, that’s not true.
I can recall a meeting in my 20s with a client where I had a fit of the giggles and had to excuse myself, under the pretense of my contact lens falling out. It would not have been considered professional! However, does that one incident make me unprofessional? Some of you might say ‘yes’, and so be it.
What Should A Yoga Teacher Look Like?
A few years ago, during my addiction to Bikram Yoga, I was pleasantly surprised to see a curvy teacher greet me for the 6.30am class one morning. Even more, I was surprised and delighted, due to the fact that any teacher I had met previously looked emaciated, and just a little bit grey, in my opinion. This new teacher made me feel really comfortable and I truly enjoyed the class. Why? Perhaps I realised that anyone could be a yoga teacher. Maybe it felt liberating in my mind. Actually, this is the first time I’ve really considered this experience and it begs the question, what must I have been thinking to go to a class twice a day when I was taught by skinny and slightly grey people? What was I trying to achieve? Funny!
How Our Assumptions Steer Us
Anyway, many years later we had a guest in Sri Lanka who wanted to do some yoga. So, we sent off to see our regular yoga teacher. When I questioned him about his class he said “Yes, I enjoyed it thanks! And she actually looked like a proper yoga teacher, so that made me enjoy it more.”
I’m sure you can guess which question I asked him next. So, what was his response? “well she was very thin and she looked vegan.” Mmmmm…. we could go on for hours here! He he he!
Our Lizard Brain Likes The Safety
Effectively, we have to get what we expect to feel safe. Our lizard brain loves ‘known’ and safety. Does that mean that we have been trained to consider everything that’s new, different or unexpected as “wrong”, “unacceptable” or “frightening”? Is our need to categorise generating more fear in the world?
If that’s the case, then we might want consider a new approach if we’re thinking about moving to Mars!
Life Is A Buffet - Why Do We Resist?
Since there are so may behavioural choices available to us today, a variety of modes of working, a plethora of opinions out there in the world for us to consider, multiple places we can travel to and a wide range of places we can choose to live. There are countless different clothes we can wear, copious colours, and numerous ideas.
So, what is it that makes us behave like warriors when we attach ourselves to an idea that feels safe? What triggers us to lock our jaws and refuse to compromise or expand our thinking? Well, it’s those teeny tiny seeds that were planted in our minds from birth.
The cultural assumptions, the parental and familial values, the layers of beliefs that hold all of that childhood training in place.
In my mind, we can either work on breaking those chains voluntarily, or we’ll be forced to break the chains soon, whether we like it or not. I think we all have an idea as to which approach might be more comfortable.
The Message Is Old - Are We Blind To Our Senses?
Toffler’s message is not new. There’s nothing ground-breaking here. So, why is it that we’re still stuck in the mud in our everyday reality? What is it about Einstein that makes him so easy to ignore? There are so many more, what about all the others? Ghandi, Benjamin Franklin, Confucius, George Patton, Richard Branson, Jim Rohn, Lao Tse, Machiavelli are just a handful of the thousands who have sent the same message. And yet here we are still, in practicum, clutching onto 17th century physics and a Victorian social etiquette as if it’s the last food on the planet.
What Keeps These Ideas Alive?
One approach could be to find someone or something to blame. We could suggest that it has to start with education, and then go on a long process of changing education structures. Is social media driving conformity and should we try to control it? Ooops, more limits!
On the other hand, we could be bold and work only on expanding our own thinking. Perhaps we could weather the storm of the fearful feelings, of the ridicule, or the cold shoulder. Perhaps we can go in search of our own authenticity. We might pick and choose from the buffet of life, rather than settle for the grey, perfectly shaped food we find inside the box. Maybe we might create new things to add to the buffet and really confuse some people!
Only you can know what’s right for you.
Where Are We Heading - Can We Reduce Our Need To Categorise?
As we expand, we may find we inspire just one person to come with us on a journey of exploration. They, in turn, may choose to do the same.
Who knows! Personally, I’d much rather hear the words “weird, crazy, real, curious, eccentric, childishly enthusiastic, disruptive, experience-hunter, searcher, traveller, and gung-ho” at my funeral than something a little more ‘socially acceptable’. But what do I know? I LOVE pickled gherkins AND I’m weird!
Your life. Your path. Your choice.
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