The Canvas On Which We Paint
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a collection of practical techniques, skills and strategies which can lead to a profound level of insight and understanding of self and others. Even though it’s not a philosophy or religion, NLP draws from many different teachings. Specifically, within the psychology field, it draws on the field of cognitive and behavioural psychology. Moreover, when we engage with NLP on either in coaching or as we learn to become NLP practitioners, we are asked to adopt a set of assumptions or ideas that support the practice. The 14 Presuppositions of NLP summarise those concepts. By aligning with these ideas, we can deliver the best possible NLP coaching and they support us in living an empowered and expansive life experience.
This article explains the 14 Presuppositions of NLP and how to work with them. If you’re studying NLP and you want to remember them, “RESPECT-UR-WORLD” is a useful mnemonic device to help you remember them.
The 14 Presuppositions of NLP Explained
1. Respect All Models Of The World.
Everyone has a different view or ‘model’ of the world. Based on our experience, which is linked to geography, family, community, economy, education, religion, experience and mindset.
We don’t have to agree on values and beliefs. Actually, we’re merely interested in ensuring our own values and beliefs system offers us the greatest level of choice and opportunity.
If we’re working with a coaching client, we’re supporting them to expand their view and comfort zone to increase their empowerment and choice. Specifically, there is no desire or requirement to change their belief or values system, merely to remove limitations within their model to allow them to feel more freedom.
2. Ecology Is Critical.
We assess whether behaviour or change is appropriate, WITH the client, based on the context, environment and ecology. For example, a behaviour in the workplace may be appropriate, however, that same behaviour in a personal relationship may not be.
3. Signals of Resistance Indicate Lack of Rapport.
Often we assume that rapport exists only between people. However, often we lack rapport with an idea, value or concept. So, if we are resisting making a change in our behaviour (and this is most frequently an unconscious conflict with our desires), we want to look beyond.
Specifically, we are either out of rapport with the person we’re working with, or there is a negative emotion or protection mechanism operating within mind to prevent rapport with an idea. Whatever the reason, there are solutions to rebuild rapport with a person or an idea.
4. People Are Not Their Behaviour.
For success in our own lives or when working as an NLP Coach or Practitioner, we want to operate from a foundation of acceptance. Frankly, if we can’t accept ourselves, just as we are, or a client just as they are, we limit our options and choices. Moreover, no matter how behaviour may appear to the outside world, there is always a positive intention. Frequently, the positive intention behind unhelpful behaviour is self-protection.
We are not the story we tell in words or action. In fact we are beings of wholeness with infinite potential, that is to say, our behaviour is not who we are. If we can view everyone in this way, we can then choose if we want to accept or reject specific behaviour. Moreover, we confirm in our minds that behaviour can be changed.
5. Everyone Is Doing The Best They Can.
Just like everything in nature we evolve, develop and grow. This means that the internal resources we have also expand over time. As a result, it is purposeless to berate ourselves for something that happened in the past, because our perspective, experience or behaviour was less developed than it is now. We are always doing the best that we can with the resources we have available.
Think about is in the context of a young child learning to walk. Do we berate them the first time they fall down after standing up? No. We encourage them because we know that they are strengthening their muscles and their ability to balance through practice. Everything we do in life and the way we perceive the world operates in the same way.
6. Calibrate On Behaviour.
The most important information we have about a person is their behaviour. We all have our masks and we all have our stories. What’s more, sometimes our real behaviour is outside of our conscious awareness.
So, we always assess willingness to change, and actual change based on behaviour, rather than what a client or we say.
7. Territory Is Not Defined By The Map.
We know that words are symbolic and, as a result, ambiguous. Therefore, the words that we use do not necessarily represent the situation we are describing when we use them. Moreover, if we’re working as a coach, we can acknowledge that although words may no be representative of an event itself, they are indicative of direction of focus and expansion or limitation in the mind.
8. YOU Are In Charge Of Your Behaviour
When we exist in the present moment we are aware of our thoughts and feelings. Moreover, when we consciously acknowledge them, we can direct our thoughts in any way we choose. This choice gives us power over our behaviour. Specifically, when we choose to think specific thoughts, we choose our behaviour. Unconscious behaviour (operating outside of our awareness) can be addressed by releasing negative emotions and limiting believes. To put it another way, we integrate the parts of us which appear separated.
9. Resources Are Ever-Present
We are trained by society to look outside for strength, guidance and knowledge. Actually, we have all the resources inside us we could possibly want, to achieve anything we desire. All we have to do is look within to access them. There are no unresourceful people, only unresourceful states.
10. Wholeness Is The Ultimate Objective
Everything operates as one, in flow. Our emotions are linked to our thoughts and behaviour. Subsequently, our mind is linked to our body and our health. The more wholeness we can perceive within ourselves, the more we are able to live long, happy and healthy lives.
Moreover, the less separation we perceive in ourselves, especially our behaviour, the more authentic we can be. We can remove any masks we wear and operate from our authentic place of being. We can operate from wholeness. The greater the level of wholeness in ourselves, the easier it is to see that we are part of the universe and everything within it. We are part of the flow.
11. Only The Concept of Feedback Exists
In simple terms, there is no failure, there is just feedback or a universal reaction to a test. We are always operating in a testing and feedback loop, in every area of our lives. In fact, what seems like failure can be considered as a successful outcome we did not pursue to its outcome. Specifically, how many lightbulbs that didn’t work were invented before a working light bulb was created?
With this insight and perspective, we can stop blaming ourselves and others, find solutions and improve the outcome of our effort. Additionally, we learn to be tenacious and flexible.
12. Response Is The Meaning Of Communication
We are always communicating. In fact, even when we remain silent, we are communicating. Consequently, non-verbal communication can account most of our communication. Moreover, While your intention may be clear to you, it is the other person’s interpretation and response that reflects how effective your communication is. NLP teaches you the skills and flexibility to minimise miscommunication and to increase clarity. It’s always useful to remember that we receive communication through our own filters of perception. As a result, we cannot CONTROL how communication is received.
13. The Law of Requisite Variety.
Simply put, the person with the most flexibility has the greater level of control, or potential to control the environment. If something isn’t working, stop and do something else. The more flexible we are, the greater chance of achievement we give ourselves. Flexibility and creativity is the key to success.
14. Design Procedures To Increase Choice
Whether we are working with ourselves or with a coaching client. We want to have a couple of ideas in our awareness. Firstly, there is always a choice. Even if choices are all unattractive, there is always choice.
Secondly, all discussion and direction of thought and intervention wants to increase choice. The more choice we have, the more freedom we feel. When we feel free, we are empowered.
Empowerment Is A Choice
Above I’ve explained the 14 Presuppositions of NLP and how we can apply them. I hope you enjoy exploring them.
Even if you’re not engaging in NLP Coaching or you have no intention of learning NLP, these assumptions can be a useful way to expand your mindset and deliver you more choice in daily life.
Most important of all, anything can be accomplished if there is desire and a reasonable plan. Specifically, when we break down intentions or goals into small enough tasks, we can accomplish those steps one at a time. There is no rush.
Find Out More About Working With Me
To find out more about coaching with me, or if you’d like to arrange a call to see if we’re a good fit for one another, please send me an email to sarah@sarahmerron.com.
You can book NLP coaching online here.
Find out about NLP Training here.
If you’re interested in group training and coaching, you can check out my Farcical Life Programmes here.
If you’re looking for free self-help tools please visit my YouTube Channel to find free resources for a positive mindset shift.
